Hope

This past week a mother and son came by the Church in need of help. There was something in this Mom’s face that spoke volumes. It said she had had a rough few days. It said she was concerned about what was going to happen next. It said she worried that her son would realize how stressed she was about their situation.

I have seen that before. I don’t remember how old I was, and I am not sure where we had been, but I saw that same look on my Mom’s face many years ago. It was some time after my Mom and Dad divorced, but still in a time where things are a little fuzzy. My Mom, my brother, and I were headed home from somewhere. I don’t remember from where or why we had gone there… It was dark outside, I had fallen asleep on the back seat, and my brother had fallen asleep in the back floor board (back when we did not have to sit in car seats or even wear a seat belt). I began to wake up, I think because Mom was crying. Mom made an excuse that she needed a potty break, to stop at an Allsup’s. I was beginning to wake up when Mom went into Allsup’s. She told me she needed to use the restroom, but she never did. She stayed at the front of the store talking with the clerk. I could see she was crying, but not sure why. I later found out we were out of gas and out of money. When Mom walked back out to the car, there was that look. The look that said the future was uncertain. The look that said she was concerned that she had two sons in the car with no gas and no money. The look that said, how could I have gotten us into this situation…

Mom got back in the car and just sat there for what seemed like forever to this little boy, but was probably not more than a few minutes. I do not know if she was trying to figure out what to do next or what. Eventually a police officer stopped at Allsup’s for his evening snack. As he paid for his items, the cashier pointed out to the old blue Oldsmobile, with the crying woman and two little boys. As the police officer came out, he headed in our direction. Mom got out of the car and went towards him. They talked for a few minutes. The officer went back to his car and Mom climbed back in to ours. The police officer slowly drove around to where we were parked. Mom slowly backed our car out and followed the officer, muttering under her breath, “Please make it, please make it, just a little further…” The officer stopped in front of a large metal barn and motioned for my mom to pull around to the side. He filled up our car with gas, talked with Mom for a few minutes, handed her a few pieces of paper with phone numbers in case we needed additional help before reached home.

When Mom got back in to the car, there was a different look on her face. Hope. Hope that tomorrow would be a new day. Hope that things were not as bad as they seemed in this moment… That officer was a bearer of hope that night. At the time I did not understand what was going on, and to be honest I am still not sure what was going on, but that man offered an unfamiliar woman hope, and that hope made a difference.

I pray that the staff and I offered hope to the mom and son that stopped by our church last week. I pray we were a calm in the chaos they found themselves in. These opportunities do not happen every day. When the time comes, are you prepared to offer hope to those who desperately need it? It is an inconvenience to stop our busy lives to attend to those in need, but it shows our character, our humanity, when we do so to make a difference in their lives…

A Rattail and an Earring...

When I was younger, my Mom made sure that my brother’s and my hair was cut regularly and that we were presentable. My aunt cut hair for a living, and one of my Mom’s really good friends was in charge of the School of Cosmetology at our local Junior College. My Mom had her definition of what a “presentable” young man should look like, and if I ever wanted to make a change to my presentation she would ask, “How would you look in a suit?” or “Would you really want to go to church like that?” That was usually the end of me trying to make a change. I never really thought of it, but rarely did I have a suit to wear, and if I did I rarely wore it. Once in Junior High, Mom let me walk to get my hair cut. All my friends were growing rattails, so since Mom was not with me I told the lady cutting my hair I was going to grow a rattail. I walked back proudly having made my decision. However as soon as Mom saw it she made me turn around and walk back and get my hair cut again.

After my Mom passed away, I continued to get my hair cut in the same way and try to dress in a way that was her type of “presentable.” I could still hear her voice asking me, “How would you look in a suit?” Over the years I did let my hair get a little longer than she would have liked. During a few “rebellious” months I parted my hair in a different place and had an earring. It wasn’t until after I got married that I really made some changes. My wife wanted me to have my hair cut much differently than how my Mom would have liked it. I felt like I was doing something wrong by not getting my hair cut the way Mom would have wanted it.

Last fall my wife said she wanted me to grow my hair out. So, I let my hair grow much longer than I have ever let it grow. Recently my wife told me she decided she didn’t like it long. So, I cut it off. Over the past few months I have had people tell me they liked my longer locks or they disliked my locks. Some thought my longer locks made me look younger; others have said I look more “presentable” without them.

We all have voices that speak into our lives. Sometimes those voices inhibit what we do, at other times they spur us forward. Sometimes the voices compete with each other. Part of growing up is learning which voices to listen to, and which voices not to. Have you been listening to the right voices? Maybe you find yourself where you are because of the voices you have listened to. Maybe it is time to stop listening to certain voices and start listening to others. It may be time to stop listening to the voices that want to mold you into how they think you should be, so that you can listen to the voices that encourage you to live into the person you were created to be.

Ashes...

The Season of Lent has begun. You might have seen some of your co-workers, neighbors, etc. with a gray-ish smudge on their foreheads yesterday. In my faith tradition, Lent is a time to take stock of our lives and make decisions on how to make changes so that our lives more closely reflect our beliefs.

Some people use the Season of Lent to eliminate bad habits from their life, or to become healthier, or to spend more time with family… For many Lent has become a time for giving something up. Lent is meant to be a time for us to once again take stock of our lives, what is good and what needs changing.

For many of us we want our lives to be better. We want our relationships to be healthier. We want our waist lines to be smaller. We want our lives to be different in some way, but our lives are so busy it becomes difficult to find time to not only think about how different our lives could be but what we need to do to live into those desires.

Those who lived before us saw wisdom in taking different seasons of the year to focus on something area of our lives. They came to realize if we don’t focus on something we will fail to focus on anything. For me, Lent has become less about giving up something and more about giving myself to something. For me, giving up soft drinks or television just to give something up might not be the best use of this season. But, trying to become a better husband, or a better father, or friend might be much more beneficial. I know if I gave up soft drinks, at the end of Lent I would resume this consumption. But if I become a better husband I’m not going to slip back into being less of a husband.

I hope that you find a way to take advantage of this season, and your life becomes more complete by the focus of the season.

Your Creation...

This last Sunday my youngest son came home from Church with a paper plate. But this wasn’t just any paper plate. This is a paper plate that he created an angel on during his time in our Church’s Nursery. Well, he created in as much as a 2 year old can; he had some help from those watching over him. Someone traced his foot on a paper plate to make the body of the angel. He had some help bending pipe cleaners for wings and a mouth. He had some help gluing on little fuzz balls, googley eyes, and glitter. But this is his angel, and he is sooooo proud of it. He has been walking around showing each of us his angel. He has been trying to tell us about his angel (in a way that only a 2 year old can). He is proud of his creation and he wants to show everyone.

When is the last time you were proud of something you accomplished? When is that last time you did something and could not wait to tell everyone about it, or show others what you were able to accomplish? Each one of us was created uniquely. Each one of us was given abilities, talents, gifts to use and share with the world. Not all of us are able to make plate angels. Not all of us can fix a car or a lawn mower. Not all of us can prepare a meal. Not all of us can speak up for those that do not have a voice. Not all of us can teach children. Not all of us can… But, each one of us can do something! And that something we can do should give us some pride. If there is not anything we have done that we are proud of, it is possible that we are not using our gifts, or at least not using our gifts to benefit the world.

May there be something in your life that you can’t wait to show others. May there be something you are doing that you can’t stop telling others about. Be proud of what you can do, because you may be the only person that can….

Through a freind's eyes

I have several friends who blog on a regular basis. I will get a message on Facebook or I will get an e-mail letting me know when they have posted a new post on their blog. Not too long ago I was reading a friend’s blog, about a friend they met in college. As I was reading my friend’s post I began to realize my friend was writing about me. It was interesting to catch a glimpse of myself through my friend’s eyes.

We were made to be in relationships. We need relationships. We need people around us who will help us see ourselves in a little different way. Often, we can’t see things about ourselves, because we are too close to the situation… We need people around us who can help us see the good and bad in our lives that we are blind to. That does not mean we let others define who we are, but we need to let others speak into our lives so that we have a more complete picture of who we are.

Having people in our lives that can and will help us see ourselves more completely is a huge gift to us. They can help us act in a different way or refrain from doing certain things so that we don’t always have to learn the hard way. They can also help us see the many ways we are unique, we are gifted, and the talents we were created with.

I hope that you have people in your life who will celebrate your uniqueness by sharing with you the gifts and talents they see in you. I hope that you have people in your life that will help steer you away from the pitfalls they see up ahead. I hope that you have people who will help you see yourself in a more complete way, those that will not define who you are but will let you grow into who you were created to be.

Night Lights

When we moved into our current house several years ago, it seemed so dark at night. The first few days/weeks I cannot count the number of times I bumped into a cabinet, or a piece of furniture, or I slapped at a wall trying to find a light switch. I purchased numerous night lights to save my shins, elbows, etc. from the torture that furniture laying in wait dishes out.

The night lights were nice. I could see where I was going at night and didn’t have to turn on all the lights in the house to do it. The kids had a light in their room so if they happened to wake up in the middle of the night, they could get their bearings and go back to sleep.

A few months ago, I started noticing that I don’t like the lights anymore. It started with a light that wasn’t even in my house. About a block away there is a street light. Once the leaves fell from the trees in our backyard and our neighbors’ yard (and I think one or two branches might have come down by the wind), that street light shines right in my eyes as I lay in bed. I can see that silly light even with my eyes closed. So I would roll over and the light from our electric blanket would shine in my eyes. At times I have lain in bed not able to sleep because of how bright the house is.

Now that the house has become more familiar, I am able to notice all of the other lights I didn’t notice before. There is a light on the VCR, the phone cradle, the TV, our alarm clocks, my wife’s computer, the coffee maker, the space heater in the corner, etc. These lights were there before, yet I was just not aware enough to notice them. Our house is anything but dark anymore, and there have been several night lights that have had to find their way into a drawer.

How often in life do we deal with other “night lights”? For a time they are helpful to help us get our bearings, or get us where we need to go. These things may help us feel more secure or make us feel more freedom... But, at some point, they stop becoming helpful and become more of a hindrance or inconvenience.

The subtitle of a book I was recently given is “What Got You Here Won’t Get You There.” Too often we continue to rely on things that were once helpful, long past their usefulness. There are times in our lives we need to put those things away because they aren’t needed, because we have grown, changed, and have become more comfortable in our surroundings. We may have to find a new “tool” to help move us forward in our lives, but if we cling to what got us here, we won’t ever get there. For healthier relationships, minds, bodies, etc. there are things we need to let go of so that we can grow and change.

Rocks

My oldest son started a bad habit his first year of school. The school that he went to had several large trees that dropped “nuts”. Our son would grab hand full’s of these “nuts and place them in his pocket. He has passed this habit on to his younger brother. The items they place in their pockets (who knows for what reason) have changed. Sometimes we find dandelion heads, or leaves, very often we find rocks, pebbles are probably a more appropriate term, but they are still rocks.

Recently I was taking clothes out of the washer and dryer and found several rocks that had escaped our pre-wash search. As I was taking the rocks out of the washer and dryer I was a little frustrated. “Why do the boys pick up these rocks and leave them in their pockets? “ I thought to myself. As I was asking the question a memory hit me. When I was younger my family had a ranch southwest of our hometown. When we would go to the ranch my brother and I would take “hikes” and find all sorts of beautiful or unique rocks. We would pick up these rocks and take them to Mom so she could see the wonderful treasures we had found. We also wanted to bring these treasures home, but Mom would always tell us that they wouldn’t look as unique at home. Sometimes we would listen to her and leave the rocks to be rediscovered later, but sometimes we smuggled some home. After a few days or sometimes a few weeks we would pull out our rock treasures to marvel at what we had found and brought home. It never failed, every time we pulled these treasures out all we had were just a bunch of rocks.

These memories started me thinking. How many times are we like those rocks my brother and I used to smuggle home? In our natural environment we sparkle we shine, we are beautiful, we are unique, but when we are taken out of our natural environment we look a little plain, we don’t look as special…

I hope you never have to suffer from being taken out of your “natural environment” and look plain and ordinary. I hope that you can find your “natural environment” so that you can sparkle and shine, and show the world your uniqueness.