Seeing Others

“I just want to thank you for seeing me. Most people don’t.”

We were recently in Fort Worth visiting my sister-in-law. We decided to go to downtown Fort Worth to the Water Gardens. My wife and I visited the Water Gardens several times while we were dating, engaged, and while on our Honeymoon. We were on vacation trying to make some memories for our kids, and we wanted to share a place with them where my wife and I had made some memories. While we were walking from the parking lot my wife’s sister-in-law had directed us to, my wife and I remembered a book we had read not too long ago. Same Kind of Different As Me tells the story of an international art dealer, a homeless man, and the woman who brought them together. In the book, Denver, the homeless man, tells a story about how a lot of the homeless men in the downtown Fort Worth area bath in the Water Gardens. My wife and I began to share with her sister Denver’s story and a little more about the book.

Our children ran ahead of us into the Gardens. I caught up with them while my wife and her sister continued to talk as they strolled towards the Gardens. When I caught up to our children, I sat down with our youngest while the others ran around waiting for the girls. Not long before my wife and her sister caught up with us a man walked by and I said hi to him. When the girls caught up we started the journey of getting strollers down several flights of stairs. While moving the strollers I heard “Excuse me… I just want to thank you for seeing me. Most people don’t.”

Tom was making his life in the downtown area of Fort Worth. Tom had been hit hard by the economic down turn. He lost his job, his vehicle, and eventually his apartment. We talked for a bit. He shared with me about his life, about his experience on the streets, and the loneliness of feeling isolated and being treated less than human by those who walked the downtown streets. My saying hi to him meant something. I saw him.

When I was in College I remember someone telling me that in a certain language “Hello” actually meant “I see that you are here with me.” How often do we not “see” others around us? We go out of our way to avoid “those” people, or to stay out of “that” part of town… How often do we pass others who just need to be acknowledged? We don’t have to go to a big city to come into contact with those who are not seen by most of the people around them, they are here in our community as well. They too may have been hit hard by the economic down turn, or unfortunate circumstances have led them into a life they would rather not be living. More often than not we choose not to see people, because we are afraid of what seeing them might cost us, time, money, etc. But when we choose not to see others, we choose to withdraw a little from community, from sharing our life. The simple act of saying hi, of waving, of asking how someone is doing may change their day, their attitude, their life because someone took the time to see them.